"Beauty privilege is very real. None of us are imagining it, and if we aren’t born genetic lottery winners, our only option is to compensate with style, grace, and charm. Of course, none of that shit comes cheap. That’s kind of the whole point. It’s all meant to be aspirational and exclusionary. We’re supposed to feel depressed by our skin, agitated by our bodies, and anxious about our invisibility. That’s the insidious subtlety of social control. The worst part is that we know in our rational minds that it’s all bullshit, and yet we’re still plagued with self-loathing when we can’t live up to unattainable beauty standards. No matter how much self-acceptance we achieve, we can still look in the mirror and instantly catalog all the things about ourselves that we don’t think measure up. It’s maddening. It makes us feel like hypocrites even though it’s not our hypocrisy."

The Coquette @ Adult-Mag

(I love this. There’s nothing that makes me happier as a writer than finding my work quoted and reblogged all over tumblr.)

Break My Fall - Golden Coast

Thanks for the tune, Michelle. You’re right. This is an excellent summer jam.

crabmidge:

crabmidge:

I’m so disappointed 
I’m too chicken to reblog this and I need to sleep so here’s a screenshot
Didn’t think Coquette would be a racist scumbag atheist :( 
That’s right, ignore history and blame everything on the backward religion and lack of rationality of everyone in the Middle East. If only everyone in the world was a rational white person. 

More on why dearcoquette's last post bugs me, which I didn't have time to write out yesterday.
She uses the correct definition of racism and she knows what white privilege is, but she didn’t take it into account when she answered this. The question was shit anyway, because it implies  that “peace in the middle east” is some hypothetical, impossible thing.
Checking your privilege means treading carefully when, as a white atheist/secularist, you discuss PoC religions, because many white atheists use their atheism to hide racist views.
For example, every racist French person will tell you that no, they don’t have a problem with Arabs, they are just wary of religious fundamentalism, and since many Arabs are muslim, and Muslims tend to be more religious than Christians, that’s why they don’t want an Arab to marry their daughter or be visibly Muslim in public. I’ve heard so many variations of this excuse growing up.
More to the point, it’s willful ignorance to blame unrest in post-colonial countries on ‘religious extremism’ without mentioning US and European intervention and colonization. You don’t get a pass because as a Rational White Humanist you consider yourself above anything related to religion.
Exaggerating the importance of religion in conflicts in the Middle East and Africa is a cynical strategy used by western media anyway. Then you can blame everything on petty religious quarrels and play on the racist trope of the irrational savages who don’t know what’s good for them. Then, like Coquette, you imply that people who live in a state of “ancient tribal bullshit” don’t deserve peace…

I understand your knee jerk reaction to my use of the phrase “ancient tribal bullshit.” Hell, just the use of the word “tribal” is enough to set off everyone’s “check your privilege” alarm. Thing is, I’m using it in the proper sociological context. I really am referring to tribes, and I really am being critical of their bullshit religions.
Tribalism is a social modality. Religion is a ritualized belief system. Both social modalities and belief systems are intrinsic to what defines a given culture, but culture is different than race. Hell, the very concept of race starts breaking down when it comes to regional conflicts that span millenia, especially within the context of contemporary political correctness.
I know you’re most comfortable defending a position when you can shout “racism,” but you don’t get to claim that flavor of moral high ground here. You would be more accurate accusing me of imperialism than racism. It’s not my white privilege you want me to check. It’s my hegemonic privilege, specifically my Western privilege. (To further this point, you don’t even know what race I am. You merely assume I’m white.)
So yes, feel free to tell me to check my privilege — just get right which ones. It’s fine if you accuse me of being problematic. I am, and I know it. I choose not to tread carefully when discussing, as you put it, “PoC religions.” I won’t give organized religion a pass just because you can cite the fact that historically white people have been ethnocentric assholes on the topic. I know they were, and thanks, but I’m an entirely different kind of asshole.
Also, let’s be clear. I’m not blaming unrest in the Middle East on religious extremism. I’m blaming it on religion in toto, and the basis for my opinion extends back for many centuries before colonialism was even a factor in the region. When I say fuck organized religion, I am an equal opportunity offender. Fuck Judaism. Fuck Islam. Fuck Christianity. Fuck them all, and fuck the patriarchal tribalism that historically has always come with them.
Personally, I find it a little silly that I can’t be critical of irrational, patriarchal tribalism without you accusing me of playing into the “irrational savage” trope. That’s your white guilt bullshit, not mine. This isn’t about savagery. It’s about the systemic othering inherent to a “Your God vs My God” mentality and all of the horrible violence that ensues.
I happen to believe that tribalism is primitive and religion is irrational. As a species, we can do better. If we all evolve a bit, hopefully we will. If you find that belief problematic, so be it. If you think that makes me a “racist scumbag atheist,” then you are cordially invited to go fuck yourself.

crabmidge:

crabmidge:

I’m so disappointed 

I’m too chicken to reblog this and I need to sleep so here’s a screenshot

Didn’t think Coquette would be a racist scumbag atheist :( 

That’s right, ignore history and blame everything on the backward religion and lack of rationality of everyone in the Middle East. If only everyone in the world was a rational white person. 

More on why dearcoquette's last post bugs me, which I didn't have time to write out yesterday.

She uses the correct definition of racism and she knows what white privilege is, but she didn’t take it into account when she answered this. The question was shit anyway, because it implies  that “peace in the middle east” is some hypothetical, impossible thing.

Checking your privilege means treading carefully when, as a white atheist/secularist, you discuss PoC religions, because many white atheists use their atheism to hide racist views.

For example, every racist French person will tell you that no, they don’t have a problem with Arabs, they are just wary of religious fundamentalism, and since many Arabs are muslim, and Muslims tend to be more religious than Christians, that’s why they don’t want an Arab to marry their daughter or be visibly Muslim in public. I’ve heard so many variations of this excuse growing up.

More to the point, it’s willful ignorance to blame unrest in post-colonial countries on ‘religious extremism’ without mentioning US and European intervention and colonization. You don’t get a pass because as a Rational White Humanist you consider yourself above anything related to religion.

Exaggerating the importance of religion in conflicts in the Middle East and Africa is a cynical strategy used by western media anyway. Then you can blame everything on petty religious quarrels and play on the racist trope of the irrational savages who don’t know what’s good for them. Then, like Coquette, you imply that people who live in a state of “ancient tribal bullshit” don’t deserve peace…


I understand your knee jerk reaction to my use of the phrase “ancient tribal bullshit.” Hell, just the use of the word “tribal” is enough to set off everyone’s “check your privilege” alarm. Thing is, I’m using it in the proper sociological context. I really am referring to tribes, and I really am being critical of their bullshit religions.

Tribalism is a social modality. Religion is a ritualized belief system. Both social modalities and belief systems are intrinsic to what defines a given culture, but culture is different than race. Hell, the very concept of race starts breaking down when it comes to regional conflicts that span millenia, especially within the context of contemporary political correctness.

I know you’re most comfortable defending a position when you can shout “racism,” but you don’t get to claim that flavor of moral high ground here. You would be more accurate accusing me of imperialism than racism. It’s not my white privilege you want me to check. It’s my hegemonic privilege, specifically my Western privilege. (To further this point, you don’t even know what race I am. You merely assume I’m white.)

So yes, feel free to tell me to check my privilege — just get right which ones. It’s fine if you accuse me of being problematic. I am, and I know it. I choose not to tread carefully when discussing, as you put it, “PoC religions.” I won’t give organized religion a pass just because you can cite the fact that historically white people have been ethnocentric assholes on the topic. I know they were, and thanks, but I’m an entirely different kind of asshole.

Also, let’s be clear. I’m not blaming unrest in the Middle East on religious extremism. I’m blaming it on religion in toto, and the basis for my opinion extends back for many centuries before colonialism was even a factor in the region. When I say fuck organized religion, I am an equal opportunity offender. Fuck Judaism. Fuck Islam. Fuck Christianity. Fuck them all, and fuck the patriarchal tribalism that historically has always come with them.

Personally, I find it a little silly that I can’t be critical of irrational, patriarchal tribalism without you accusing me of playing into the “irrational savage” trope. That’s your white guilt bullshit, not mine. This isn’t about savagery. It’s about the systemic othering inherent to a “Your God vs My God” mentality and all of the horrible violence that ensues.

I happen to believe that tribalism is primitive and religion is irrational. As a species, we can do better. If we all evolve a bit, hopefully we will. If you find that belief problematic, so be it. If you think that makes me a “racist scumbag atheist,” then you are cordially invited to go fuck yourself.

*45

Soul Satisfaction (Club Mix) - Bit Funk

Tonight’s “I had no idea what time it was” music.

"Her songs I liked, but the outfits bored me: stiff, prim, and so often pastel, a hue synonymous with sweetness and artificiality. Pastels, and the Pleasantville styles they come in, also connote (to me) an anodyne, ladylike feminism that prizes smartness and self-righteousness at the expense of not only sex appeal but those who use it to win, as if brains are any less a thing of luck and cultivation than bodies, or as if the average intellect is any less artificial than (allegedly) Lana’s lips or Lana’s nose."

Sarah Nicole Prickett, wordsmithing like a boss in The New Inquiry’s supplement on Lana Del Rey

nevver:

Absence

Hey. That’s my line.

nevver:

Absence

Hey. That’s my line.

The Skin of My Yellow Country Teeth -
Clap Your Hands Say Yeah

I should do a “Music That Reminds Me Of My Exes” playlist.

For those of you who dig my taste in music, I’ve added a new playlists section to my website. I started with six playlists, and I’ll try and add at least one every month. The music is playable through the site directly, and you can download each playlist as a zipped folder of MP3s.

For those of you who dig my taste in music, I’ve added a new playlists section to my website. I started with six playlists, and I’ll try and add at least one every month. The music is playable through the site directly, and you can download each playlist as a zipped folder of MP3s.

*44

Dear Heather Thomson, You Are Not A Rapper From 2001


"If Spanx is ripping off your budding shapewear business, then obviously you’re doing something right and I tip the unfortunate fedora I have to wear because I got a photofacial over the weekend to you."

- Molls is an absolute treasure, you guys.

As far as street artists go, I’m kind of a fan of WRDSMTH. 

As far as street artists go, I’m kind of a fan of WRDSMTH. 

The Greatest View - Flume

Sexy as fuck.

There must have been at least one ancient culture whose name for the Milky Way would have translated as “Giant Nighttime Sky Vagina.”

There must have been at least one ancient culture whose name for the Milky Way would have translated as “Giant Nighttime Sky Vagina.”

*56

Something You Can Feel - Stars On 33

Yesterday was fun, but I should have paced myself. I only have two hours to consume large quantities of water and gird my loins for another round of holiday weekend poolside debauchery.

Oh, by the way. I finally got around to updating my website.
Check that shit out.

Oh, by the way. I finally got around to updating my website.

Check that shit out.

Chandelier (Plastic Plates Remix) - Sia

You guys are fuckin’ awesome. Seriously.